Carol Rubel wrote a guest post here about her methodology for motivating students. Carol ran a program for “at risk” high school dropouts called Yellowwood. Students were hand-picked for the program, and would spend 4 days each week on a supervised job site as a student worker. One day per week was a scheduled “chunk day” for applied academics. Carol had expectations of her students, especially related to their demeanor and behavior on job sites. But the foundation of her relationship was focused on 2 ideas; trust and choice.
I believe the one-on-one interpersonal relationship that exists between teacher and student is the basis for learning. And trust is the basis for any fruitful relationship. An example from my own life illustrated for me how a trusting relationship promotes learning.
I had a very close friend named Terry who passed away in January 2008. Terry was a person whom I came to trust without reservation. He operated a financial planning company; I was his technology consultant and client as well.
It was about 20 years ago when he was referred. I did some spreadsheet templates for his company, and helped him handle other tech issues. After billing for my services, he called to clear up what he considered an over-charge. After a brief discussion, we agreed that I misunderstood his intent and that he was correct. I apologized and promptly adjusted the bill. That was the beginning of our relationship of trust, and I then became his client. As our relationship matured, so did our level of mutual trust. As a matter of fact, trust was the basis for all of his client relationships. Terry’s business was successful as a result!
Both of us learned because of that trust relationship. But the learning went far beyond technology and financial planning. Although we exchanged ideas on many issues, we also had deep discussions about dealing with people, our convictions about integrity, and how to change the world in our own ways. We even discussed matters of a deep personal nature. And trust was the basis for all of it.
Carol was honest with her students about how the world operates; “my kids knew that there was a quid pro quo framing their chosen behavior and the desire of their adult caretaker/educator”. She was honest about the choices they would face. She was honest about taking responsibility. Maybe there’s a reason this program was called “alternative education” because the public school system generally doesn’t promote “the integrity of trust”. Thankfully, some good teachers know this and promote it anyway. It is difficult because this media-driven world rarely promotes integrity…but that’s another post altogether.
Those trust relationships are the basis of win/win and a mentality of abundance. Check out an article about trust written by Matt May. An interesting perspective!
Think about the relationships of trust you might have in your own lives. What have you learned from them?